Repost - Anakin's Descent

***ORIGINALLY POSTED 11SEP07***


So all I ever hear about Episode III is how horrible it was. While I will give you that it could have been tons better, I think something everyone overlooks is one of the main reasons the film was made. Anakin's Descent into Darth Vader. I mean when you watched the first three movies (Episodes IV, V and VI) everybody wanted to know how D.V. got that way. Was he just a magnificent bastard from the beginning or did something happen to MAKE him that way? To turn him to the Dark Side.

I can honestly say that if I had been faced with what Anakin had faced, I may not have been able to stay pure and good. Think about it. He left his mother when he was young to become a Jedi. All well and good, but then he starts having dreams that something has happened to her. So he goes to Tattooine to find her and guess what, something HAD. Eventually he finds her only to have her die in his arms the moment he finds her. Can one of you honestly tell me that if that had happened to you, that you wouldn't have slaughtered an entire village of Tusken Raiders if you knew they were the cause of her death? Unfortunately because he tapped into the rage that he felt and let it control him, he begins his Descent.

Ain't that some shit, though? The first person that ever cared for you and loved you and because you kill the people responsible for her death, you start becoming evil. Fuck, Bourne goes after EVERYBODY because they killed his girl in Supremacy. HE doesn't become a Sith Lord. So let's analyze this further and see where Anakin further turns from the Light.

After his episode on Tattooine the Clone Wars start. So he goes to war for three years. Now if you have ever met someone who has been in intense combat you will discover that a part of them has gone out. Call it Innocence if you will. The feeling you have after you have taken someone's life and nearly lost your own is something that will never go away. Not truly. The Jedi were in the thick of it every day. And these weren't just occasional skirmishes, it was all out WAR throughout the galaxy. Oh, and they didn't hide behind a blaster and shoot from afar, no, they met every enemy face to face in single combat (mostly) and destroyed them through skill, luck and the Force.

After about three years of this, he returns home to find his young bride pregnant. Happy day, right? You would think. But not for this guy. Now he starts having dreams that the only person he has left, his Padme, is going to die in childbirth. Now as a father, I can tell you this is a very real fear. You know that song "Don't take the girl"? Third verse makes me cry every time.

"Doctor says the baby's fine but you'll have to leave
'cause his momma's fading fast and Johnny hit his knees"'

I say this just days before my wife is due with our third child, and I can't say it is any easier this time. True, there is absolutely nothing high risk about this pregnancy, but there wasn't for Padme and Anakin either. Well, at least not that he knew at the time, we know later that it was his damn fault, but that doesn't stop the fear.

So now he goes to someone that he respects and listens to, and the guy tells him that with his teaching Anakin could have the power to stop death.

Holy fuck, this is heady. If I knew that my wife was going to die in childbirth and someone tells me that I can have the power to stop that, I sure as shit don't think I could turn away. Remember the Tim McGraw song? Do you know what the next lines were?

"Take the very breath you gave me
Take the heart from my chest
I'll gladly take her place if you'll let me
Make this my last request
Take me out of this world
God, please don't take the girl"

I once had someone tell me that they couldn't understand why Anakin turned bad. I told them they had never been in love. It pissed them off, but I was right. They'll never know it until they are truly in love. With someone other than themselves. Once that day comes, if they think back on our conversation, they will suddenly realize why Anakin turned.

Is that an excuse? No. But it's an understanding. I'm not saying that he was justified it murdering the Younglings, but I am saying I understand his pain. No, I have never lost someone close to me, but I can tell you that even the THOUGHT of it is enough to drive me to the brink of sanity. Maybe it's because I have a very very small group of people I truly love. (Six total)

Or maybe it's because I know that if ever faced with losing my soul or losing someone I love, I'd better pack a suitcase for some hot weather because I wouldn't have to choose. I know.

I was once told that if someone ever held a gun up to my head and told my parents that I would be killed if they did not renounce their faith, they would let me die. Why? Because it would be better for me. I've thought about that a lot since then. And more since I have become a parent. And I can tell you that my answer would be slightly different. If someone ever held a gun to my child's head, there is not a force on this earth or below it that would save them from my wrath. Think its cheesy? Have a kid. You'll understand. If you don't then please give your child(ren) to someone that does. Because something in you is broken.