In BIO we had an assignment to come up with a series of tests to identify different types of cells: protozoan, fungi, algae, etc. Unfortunately my teacher said to be creative. While everyone else made up run-of-the-mill tests to identify parts of the cells, this is what I came up with. Enjoy.
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"Whatever it is, it got Freddy, too. I found him in his cot, the stuff was coating his chin," Theresa dropped off another vial of the plasm. We'd been on this expedition for two weeks, more than half of our original research team was dead and we had no idea what was causing it, and we had no way out. That was the problem with being dropped off in the middle of freakin' nowhere with no contact with the outside world for a month. Oh sure we brought communication equipment, but unfortunately Mr. Murphy stopped by when Keith, our geologist, died. Nick had been trying to raise the main base and tripped while trying to find a report with an encryption key on it, smashing the radio to the ground. That radio was our only link to anyone. The satellite broke during our insertion and nobody thought to pack a spare, so we didn't even had access to the internet.
Four people had died in the last eight hours. Ever since we opened that sealed door on the south face of The Cave. On the skin around the mouth of each body was a thin, clear, bluish-green liquid substance. It appeared that they had aspirated something when they went into the room. I had a feeling we were dealing with a new type of organism, but I had yet to figure out what. I had never seen something aspirated kill so quickly. As the team's sole microbiologist it was up to me to figure out what was going on. And I had to do it fast, there was just me, Theresa and Nick left. Unfortunately Nick's specialty was security and Theresa's was physics. That left me. Alone with the stuff that appeared to be killing people in less than two hours from exposure. I coughed.
I discarded the UV light I'd been using to test the last sample of the stuff. I figured since it was colored like some algae I would try to cause photosynthesis. There was no reaction to 45 minutes of exposure with the UV light, although I guess that made sense since it seemed each team member had been infected while down in the cave. There wasn't a lot of light 500 feet under the surface of Antarctica. My eyes blurred a bit as I looked back into the microscope. I shook my head and they seemed to clear a bit.
I'd already tested to see if it was a bacteria. I'd used a form of radiation on the first sample that will encapsulate a nucleus in a thin, green shell causing it to glow under a microscope. Since there are around 100 million undescribed prokaryotic species on the planet and bacteria seems to be the most logical choice for what was killing my team members, I tested that first. Unfortunately (fortunately?) whatever it was had a nucleus, so that ruled out bacteria. Now I ruled out algae because without photosynthesis algae can't survive.
I looked under the microscope again. "I wonder..."
I grabbed the bottle of HYPstain and put a small droplet onto a new slide. Using an eye dropper I put another drop from the sample on top of the HYPstain. I slid it under a microscope. "I'll be damned." The HYPstain lit up like a christmas tree. HYPstain is designed to dye the hyphae in fungi bright green. Whatever this substance was, it was full of hyphae.
I wrote down the evidence I had so far. In the last eight hours I had run dozens of tests trying to rule out various biologicals. It had a nucleus, ruling out bacteria and similar prokaryotes; it didn't respond to UV light, showing no signs of photosynthesis, so that ruled out the algae. I'm not sure why I hadn't thought of the HYPstain before, it seemed logical now. In a cave full of unidentified organisms, why wouldn't there be molds and fungi?
It appeared that our silent killer was an ancient form of mold that humans probably have never come into contact with. The government agency funding our little "expedition" was going to be pleased. I don't suppose they cared that it cost them the lives of four of the finest minds in science. They'll get their superweapon. A mold that can kill within two hours of contact with a human host.
Now that I knew what it was, I could stop it from killing the rest of us. Hopefully unti---
25 July 2009
20 June 2009
My genes made me do it!
So in my BIO class this week we had to come up with a response to one of three different questions. The one I chose was picking either the defense or prosecution of a case where a defendant was claiming that his genetics were responsible for the crime. We were to consider things like heritability, environment, quantitative genes and polygenic traits. Most people chose other questions, only one or two people picked this one and they just analyzed things. I went a different route and decided to be creative. I wrote my piece as a prosecution attorney's closing argument in said trial. What do you guys think?
"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, as you listen to the closing arguments you will notice that the defense truly wants you to believe that the rape, mutilation and murder of these three college co-eds was because the defendant inherited "bad genes". They've taken you on a truly astounding genetic journey in their attempt to persuade you that because the defendant shared several unfortunate genetic traits with other famous serial killers - John Wayne Gacy, Ed Gein, and Hannibal the Cannibal to name a few - that he had no *choice* but to brutally rape and torture these women before finally ending their lives so far before their time. But let me posit this to you if I may: if this were true, why didn't his identical twin brother do the same? Their genetics are identical, surely those same traits exist in both brothers. So why has the brother not been brought up on similar charges? I'll tell you why. Because genetics are not responsible for these heinous crimes.
During the course of this trial you have learned that the two brothers were given for adoption to different agencies in different parts of the country in an attempt to prevent them discovering each other. You have also learned that the defendant's brother was adopted by an affluent couple when he was just a baby and was raised as their own. He went to private schools, given the best social and academic opportunities, and is well respected in his community as a leader and citizen, without even so much as a parking ticket. The defendant was not so lucky; a ward of the state he bounced from foster home to foster home, sometimes two or three in a year when he was a teenager. He was constantly in trouble with the authorities with a laundry list of charges brought against him - from petty larceny as a child, to repeated problems with drugs, to aggravated assault with a deadly weapon when he beat his tenth grade biology teacher with a keyboard for suggesting he redo a plagiarized assignment. No, genetics are not to blame for these murders. True, his is a tragic story of a broken system that has failed him time and again, but it is still a story. One that unfortunately came to a sad climax when he decided to take the lives of these three promising young girls. Not because he was genetically predisposed to violence, but because his life was one violent episode after another. Violence begets violence.
In closing, ladies and gentlemen, I ask you not to look upon the defendant as a genetic mutation that needs to be studied and fixed, but rather as the monster he truly is. As you well know, the penalty if he is found guilty of these crimes is death by injection. I want you to look at the faces of the families of this man's victims, look long and hard, and make the correct decision.
Thank you."
"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, as you listen to the closing arguments you will notice that the defense truly wants you to believe that the rape, mutilation and murder of these three college co-eds was because the defendant inherited "bad genes". They've taken you on a truly astounding genetic journey in their attempt to persuade you that because the defendant shared several unfortunate genetic traits with other famous serial killers - John Wayne Gacy, Ed Gein, and Hannibal the Cannibal to name a few - that he had no *choice* but to brutally rape and torture these women before finally ending their lives so far before their time. But let me posit this to you if I may: if this were true, why didn't his identical twin brother do the same? Their genetics are identical, surely those same traits exist in both brothers. So why has the brother not been brought up on similar charges? I'll tell you why. Because genetics are not responsible for these heinous crimes.
During the course of this trial you have learned that the two brothers were given for adoption to different agencies in different parts of the country in an attempt to prevent them discovering each other. You have also learned that the defendant's brother was adopted by an affluent couple when he was just a baby and was raised as their own. He went to private schools, given the best social and academic opportunities, and is well respected in his community as a leader and citizen, without even so much as a parking ticket. The defendant was not so lucky; a ward of the state he bounced from foster home to foster home, sometimes two or three in a year when he was a teenager. He was constantly in trouble with the authorities with a laundry list of charges brought against him - from petty larceny as a child, to repeated problems with drugs, to aggravated assault with a deadly weapon when he beat his tenth grade biology teacher with a keyboard for suggesting he redo a plagiarized assignment. No, genetics are not to blame for these murders. True, his is a tragic story of a broken system that has failed him time and again, but it is still a story. One that unfortunately came to a sad climax when he decided to take the lives of these three promising young girls. Not because he was genetically predisposed to violence, but because his life was one violent episode after another. Violence begets violence.
In closing, ladies and gentlemen, I ask you not to look upon the defendant as a genetic mutation that needs to be studied and fixed, but rather as the monster he truly is. As you well know, the penalty if he is found guilty of these crimes is death by injection. I want you to look at the faces of the families of this man's victims, look long and hard, and make the correct decision.
Thank you."
15 June 2009
Guns in restaurants
So there is a bill going around right now trying to be passed that will allow people with CCWs (Carry Concealed Weapon permit) to carry concealed into a restaurant that sells alcohol. There were several comments after the article with people saying how ludicrous this idea was because guns and alcohol don't mix (can we say "No shit, sherlock?") Normally I just let these go, but then there's THIS tool: "Do you HONESTLY feel threatened every time you go out in public? Do you think there's even a 0.1% chance that you will ever find yourself face to face with a threat to your or your family's life? Even the vast majority of police officers, who stick their noses in the face of dangerous encounters every day, never in their entire career need to draw their weapon. Yes, bad things happen - but most of you who feel like you need a gun on your person at all times, it seems like you are EXPECTING trouble, not just being prepared, and that you think a gun in your hand is the only solution. And that makes YOU scary because you are just a bit too trigger happy."
My rebuttal: Let me ask you this, how many times are police officers somewhere WHILE the crime is happening? Not many. Could it be because they don't show up until the crime has already occurred? Admittedly they are not receiving a lot of 911 calls from psychics telling them when and where the crime will happen so it isn't their fault. Talk about absurdity in logic.
My rebuttal: Let me ask you this, how many times are police officers somewhere WHILE the crime is happening? Not many. Could it be because they don't show up until the crime has already occurred? Admittedly they are not receiving a lot of 911 calls from psychics telling them when and where the crime will happen so it isn't their fault. Talk about absurdity in logic.
When is a crime going to happen? When there are no cops around. Sure there are spectacular police shootouts during drug raids, but how often do those happen at the local Coco's? With more and more restaurants now serving alcohol it's damn tough to find even a halfway decent place to eat out if you are carrying.
***NEWSFLASH*** Not everyone drinks every time they go somewhere that sells alcohol. It's silly for me to have to disarm just because they are selling alcohol in the same facility that I choose to eat dinner. Now, I don't think people should carry into bars. There really isn't much else going on in a bar but boozin' and schmoozin'. But in a family restaurant? I mean PeiWei sells beer now. With violent crime skyrocketing in this economy, I'm not going to be caught with my pants down. Remember that guy a couple months ago that attacked those two girls sitting at the bus stop with a freakin' machete? Or how about the serial stabber on the East side that was just walking around randomly stabbing men? Saying we have to disarm to go into a restaurant just because they sell alcohol is about as ridiculous a law as I've ever heard. They need to bring this bill back. And pass it.
But honestly, if you are lawfully carrying concealed, make sure it is concealed and you won't have this problem. When that whacko decides to shoot up the local Denny's would you rather have a slap on the wrist for carrying concealed in an establishment selling alcohol, or be dead? The choice is yours my friend, make it wisely.
06 June 2009
Damn Technomological Kids
As many of you know, I recently received an iPod Touch for Father's Day (yes, I talked them into giving it to me a month early, shaddup). If you have ever used one, you may know that in order to unlock it after waking you have to slide your thumb or finger from left to right along the bottom of the screen. Up to this point that has defeated Gavin. However, today while I was cooking dinner Aurora took my iPod from Gavin who had not only managed to unlock it, but had rearranged all the icons on my four screens and deleted one of the applications. ::Sigh:: I had just spent an hour two nights ago with a spreadsheet planning out my application layout so that the games were in type order and order of frequency of play and my utilities were organized by function and frequency. Did I save those spreadsheets? Nope. Didn't think I'd have to. Guess I will be recreating those and saving them.
So needless to say, my iPod now has a four-digit pin in addition to the slide lock which is going to be a pain in the ass when I need to change tracks in the car.
The funny thing is that I don't think Aurora had figured out the slide lock thing yet. I'm telling you that boy is going to be a hacker.
So needless to say, my iPod now has a four-digit pin in addition to the slide lock which is going to be a pain in the ass when I need to change tracks in the car.
The funny thing is that I don't think Aurora had figured out the slide lock thing yet. I'm telling you that boy is going to be a hacker.
30 May 2009
No Fate But What We Make
The wife and I went to see Terminator: Salvation last night. It was awesome. Not as good as I was expecting, there was a lot of potential to do more that they left out. But since there are supposed to be another two films, we'll see where they take it. Also, the rumor is that the Director's Cut will have a bunch of extra scenes, so that's exciting. I think the main problem is that I've come to expect the story to be more cerebral. I'm not sure why since none of the other movies have been, but maybe I've been ruined by TSCC. Who knows. But that isn't why I've come here tonight. The last line in the movie sparked some memories. "There is no Fate but what we make."
I realized that was what sparked my initial separation from Religion, with a capital R. When T2 came out in 1991 (I think I actually got to see in in '93) I heard that line and it set bells off in my head. I realized that the concept is one of the hardest for humanity to come to grips with. So many people are afraid of the possibility that we control our own destiny. That there is no divine or cosmic weaver of the tapestry that is our future. We've created Religion as a way to alleviate that fear. By putting our Fate or Destiny in the hands of someone else, we are relieved of the responsibility for our own actions. Not in a mundane sense, mind you. You are still responsible for kicking that puppy that got in your way. But if your spouse or child dies from cancer or some illness you can have people tell you that the Lord works in mysterious ways, or that there is a Greater Purpose for all things. It makes you feel better on some deeper level knowing that there is nothing you could have done. Maybe not, but I don't believe that there IS some greater purpose out there, or some mysterious God holding the strings of our lives.
I do, however, believe that we can affect change in our own lives and destinies. Through proper focus, thought patterns and basic ritual, we can change things. True your average meat popsicle, or Sheeple as I like to call them, is generally just going to go through life on autopilot, but there are those of us whose minds work in the upper levels of the intelligence quotient range that are capable of shaping our lives in the way we want to.
Now you may be thinking this is all mumbo-jumbo and something only creepy, spooky people do and talk about, but not so. Sure, we may go about it in a different way, but every time you pick up a self-help book, or attend one of those seminars about the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People or something you are doing the same thing. Time after time we are shown that people can affect change in their lives through proper attitude and thinking. Does that mean that God is now suddenly shining upon them? If so I ask you this: where the hell was he before? Why did it take learning about changing your attitude or thought patterns to cause that person to suddenly be in favor with God? The Xians will tell you that it's because you have now dedicated your life to him. But what if you aren't a Xian in the first place? Are you going to tell me that the only people that are truly happy and successful are Religious? I think not. I've known a lot of Religious types in my life and I can tell you that few, if any, are truly happy or successful. They always have marriage problems, or money problems, or work problems. Yes, those are all things that are by and large unavoidable, but I know that you can change how they affect you in your daily life.
Remembering that there is no Fate but what *we* make is what is key. I know too many people that are miserable here on Earth so they can be rewarded in Heaven. Why would you do that to yourself? This is the only life you will remember. Since we have no proof of an afterlife, I would have to say that it would be tough to justify having to be miserable for some unverifiable reward. How many of you would bust your ass 70 hours a week at your job only to have your boss say you "might be rewarded"? I sure as hell wouldn't. One of my favorite bumperstickers says "I believe in life before death". I couldn't agree more.
There is no forever, just today. Don't let your sacrifice waste away.
I realized that was what sparked my initial separation from Religion, with a capital R. When T2 came out in 1991 (I think I actually got to see in in '93) I heard that line and it set bells off in my head. I realized that the concept is one of the hardest for humanity to come to grips with. So many people are afraid of the possibility that we control our own destiny. That there is no divine or cosmic weaver of the tapestry that is our future. We've created Religion as a way to alleviate that fear. By putting our Fate or Destiny in the hands of someone else, we are relieved of the responsibility for our own actions. Not in a mundane sense, mind you. You are still responsible for kicking that puppy that got in your way. But if your spouse or child dies from cancer or some illness you can have people tell you that the Lord works in mysterious ways, or that there is a Greater Purpose for all things. It makes you feel better on some deeper level knowing that there is nothing you could have done. Maybe not, but I don't believe that there IS some greater purpose out there, or some mysterious God holding the strings of our lives.
I do, however, believe that we can affect change in our own lives and destinies. Through proper focus, thought patterns and basic ritual, we can change things. True your average meat popsicle, or Sheeple as I like to call them, is generally just going to go through life on autopilot, but there are those of us whose minds work in the upper levels of the intelligence quotient range that are capable of shaping our lives in the way we want to.
Now you may be thinking this is all mumbo-jumbo and something only creepy, spooky people do and talk about, but not so. Sure, we may go about it in a different way, but every time you pick up a self-help book, or attend one of those seminars about the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People or something you are doing the same thing. Time after time we are shown that people can affect change in their lives through proper attitude and thinking. Does that mean that God is now suddenly shining upon them? If so I ask you this: where the hell was he before? Why did it take learning about changing your attitude or thought patterns to cause that person to suddenly be in favor with God? The Xians will tell you that it's because you have now dedicated your life to him. But what if you aren't a Xian in the first place? Are you going to tell me that the only people that are truly happy and successful are Religious? I think not. I've known a lot of Religious types in my life and I can tell you that few, if any, are truly happy or successful. They always have marriage problems, or money problems, or work problems. Yes, those are all things that are by and large unavoidable, but I know that you can change how they affect you in your daily life.
Remembering that there is no Fate but what *we* make is what is key. I know too many people that are miserable here on Earth so they can be rewarded in Heaven. Why would you do that to yourself? This is the only life you will remember. Since we have no proof of an afterlife, I would have to say that it would be tough to justify having to be miserable for some unverifiable reward. How many of you would bust your ass 70 hours a week at your job only to have your boss say you "might be rewarded"? I sure as hell wouldn't. One of my favorite bumperstickers says "I believe in life before death". I couldn't agree more.
There is no forever, just today. Don't let your sacrifice waste away.
22 May 2009
Local geek attacked by fashion... Film at 11.
Hehe. So because of my promotion I've decided that I need to start dressing a little more respectably. When I started out at MUSD, they asked me to wear polos/collared shirts. I complied for a long time, got some Dickies work shirts and put patches on them so I could obey the letter of the law, if not the spirit. Then I bought a couple T-shirts from Think Geek and started wearing them. One said "You read my t-shirt. That's enough social interaction for one day." The other said "i > u". I got some amused responses from my bosses and wasn't told I couldn't wear them, so I started buying spiffy t-shirts all over the place. Enter the fateful "WTF?" shirt. Wore that to work one day, got my first "verbal warning". Yeah, apparently my boss knew that didn't stand for "Where's The Fun?" He said that all the kids at the high schools knew what it meant and that it was clearly inappropriate. Makes sense since that is one of the only shirts I got compliments on from students. So I reevaluated the image I was putting forth to students, teachers, and staff. I realized that while I may look like your typical "techie", I did not look the part of a System Administrator which will be my new title come July 1. Since it means almost a three dollar-an-hour raise, I figure I might need to dress to impress.
So I went shopping. A good chunk of change later and I think I am ready. I say "good chunk" but most of what I got was on sale for $7 a shirt. Yay for sales. It all started when I went with my wife to get a polo for an important meeting with some folks from Apple and the superintendent of the district. I wanted one of the polyester golf shirts since I am tired of the cotton shrinking all the damn time. One look and the wife says no. Not only no, but hell no. So I am wandering around the mens department and my wife comes up with some rather... homosexual... looking shirts. She sees my look of concern and goes "before you say anything, try them on". Needless to say I was rather dubious. I'll be damned if they didn't look fantastic. I guess it was strange for me to be wearing "color" (most of my shirts are black or dark blue). One of these was a bright blue with white pinstripes, the other gray with white stripes. I bought both and thought that would be the end of it.
I went to work the next day in the bright blue one with the sleeves rolled up a quarter of the way tucked into regular blue jeans. I had probably half a dozen people comment on how nice I looked. My boss even said "Wow, you clean up nice! What's the occasion?" I wasn't sure how to take that. Did I really look that nice or did I just normally look like shit so even the smallest effort stands out? That decided it for me. Come July 1, no more T-shirts at work unless I am doing something dirty (moving PCs, hauling stuff around, etc). I went back to the store and went nuts. I now have the original two, another blue w/ white stripes (different than the other one, not as bright); a pink and a yellow shirt, both also with white pinstripes; a pastel purple and a tea green (both with ties) and a pale blue shirt. All are long-sleeve oxfords that I will be rolling up and either tucking in or not depending on my mood. I was IMing one of the girls at work telling her I had clothes with color and she goes "The day you buy a yellow shirt is the day the world will end." I actually had to take a picture of them hanging in my closet and send it to her to prove it. After she looks at the pic she goes "OMG!!! Is that one next to it PINK?!?!?" Hehe. I am amused. I may look metro, but at least I won't have people falling down in shock over my dressing up once or twice.
So I went shopping. A good chunk of change later and I think I am ready. I say "good chunk" but most of what I got was on sale for $7 a shirt. Yay for sales. It all started when I went with my wife to get a polo for an important meeting with some folks from Apple and the superintendent of the district. I wanted one of the polyester golf shirts since I am tired of the cotton shrinking all the damn time. One look and the wife says no. Not only no, but hell no. So I am wandering around the mens department and my wife comes up with some rather... homosexual... looking shirts. She sees my look of concern and goes "before you say anything, try them on". Needless to say I was rather dubious. I'll be damned if they didn't look fantastic. I guess it was strange for me to be wearing "color" (most of my shirts are black or dark blue). One of these was a bright blue with white pinstripes, the other gray with white stripes. I bought both and thought that would be the end of it.
I went to work the next day in the bright blue one with the sleeves rolled up a quarter of the way tucked into regular blue jeans. I had probably half a dozen people comment on how nice I looked. My boss even said "Wow, you clean up nice! What's the occasion?" I wasn't sure how to take that. Did I really look that nice or did I just normally look like shit so even the smallest effort stands out? That decided it for me. Come July 1, no more T-shirts at work unless I am doing something dirty (moving PCs, hauling stuff around, etc). I went back to the store and went nuts. I now have the original two, another blue w/ white stripes (different than the other one, not as bright); a pink and a yellow shirt, both also with white pinstripes; a pastel purple and a tea green (both with ties) and a pale blue shirt. All are long-sleeve oxfords that I will be rolling up and either tucking in or not depending on my mood. I was IMing one of the girls at work telling her I had clothes with color and she goes "The day you buy a yellow shirt is the day the world will end." I actually had to take a picture of them hanging in my closet and send it to her to prove it. After she looks at the pic she goes "OMG!!! Is that one next to it PINK?!?!?" Hehe. I am amused. I may look metro, but at least I won't have people falling down in shock over my dressing up once or twice.
30 April 2009
How to order tacos without being a bitch.
I went into Chipotle tonight to get a couple burritos for the wife and I. In front of me was this yuppie in her "scrub clothes" (read t-shirt and designer jeans with no makeup) holding a four year old. She goes up to order and asks for a Burrito Bol, three tacos and a taco on the side. The guy looks at her, obviously confused, and goes "What was that?" "I want three tacos and one on the side" "On the side of what?" "It's for him," and she nods at the kid. So he replies "Oh so you want an order of three tacos and an another taco by itself?" She goes completely cold. I was standing two feet *behind* her and I felt a blast of ice. "Yes, that's what I said when I said I wanted one on the side." The guy gets a little uncomfortable and tries to make a joke... he kind of giggles and goes "I just wasn't sure what you wanted it on the side of." She just stared him down. He finishes making what she wanted with her being a total douche to him. She gets passed off to the next person responsible for salsa and toppings, and I walk up to the counter. I started ordering and I could tell that the guy was uncomfortable so I lean in and go "Yeah, dude, I think you ruined her whole day with that on the side business." He chuckled and immediately relaxed. So I get near the end, passed off to the condiment lady, tell her what I want and I hear "The Bitch" complaining to the cashier. She was trying to do it quietly but I heard her say how rude the guy was and that she was never coming back because of his attitude, yada yada yada. I saw the guy keep looking over and he looked like he was getting nervous again. The cashier asked if she wanted to talk to the manager but the douchecunt just waved her off and stormed out. I walked up to the cashier, handed my credit card and said (rather loudly) "For the record he wasn't rude in any way, shape, or form, she was just being a bitch." I'm pretty sure she heard me and I saw the guy grin.
Normally I am the one pissed at the less than intelligent fast food workers, but that guy was honestly confused because she made no fucking sense. I would have reacted exactly the same as he did. Who orders three tacos with one taco on the side? On the side of what? Why not just order four tacos? Or say "I need an order of three tacos and then one extra one"? That makes a shit ton more sense than one on the side.
I wonder if she asks for sex with cock on the side.
Normally I am the one pissed at the less than intelligent fast food workers, but that guy was honestly confused because she made no fucking sense. I would have reacted exactly the same as he did. Who orders three tacos with one taco on the side? On the side of what? Why not just order four tacos? Or say "I need an order of three tacos and then one extra one"? That makes a shit ton more sense than one on the side.
I wonder if she asks for sex with cock on the side.
27 April 2009
Obituary
At 423 years old, Sir Lord Goatama Himself, was the oldest, most cantankerous asshole on the planet for the last several centuries. He flew his car himself right up until the day he died from sheer exhaustion after pleasing every playmate at the new Playboy Amusement Park in what used to be sunny Southern California, but is now known as The Floating City of Debauchery. He is survived by more children, grand children, great grandchildren, etc etc etc than the mythical/biblical Abraham. In fact, it is believed that everyone on the planet is somehow tied to this multi-billionaire, either through birth or marriage. His most significant accomplishment in his long-ass life was abolishing the entire "PC" movement. He is quoted as saying "Fuck political correctness right in its ear."
25 April 2009
When are T.H.E.Y. gonna get it?
It saddens me to realize that The International Organization of T.H.E.Y. is never going to "get it". This country is still run by a government and corporations that are stuck in 19th century mindsets. Schools are primarily setup in the same way they have been almost since their inception. Nobody is taking into account that the world is different, the people are different, the technology is different. We no longer learn by being lectured to, we no longer understand by rote. We have to change the way things are being done.
I just finished the finale of Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles. I am pretty sure they are not going to renew it for another season. Do you want to know why? Because TV networks are still doing everything by Nielsen ratings. Are you kidding me? Raise your hand if you still watch ALL your shows ONLY when they are aired. Interesting, I don't see any. Um, you in the back, you can put your arm down. Nobody likes you anyway. Instead we watch TV on DVRs, TiVos, Hulu, iTunes, and network websites. We watch shows when WE want to. Our lives are too sporadic to live by a schedule determined by dumbasses in thousand-dollar suits. Yet they still gauge everything they do by those little Nielsen boxes. I'll tell you what, I have seen too many shows go the way of the dodo because of those fucking boxes. When are they going to get a clue? I read once that the reason they don't take all the other sources into account when they tabulate their data is because it's too much information. So we get shows like Firefly, Dresden Files, Moonlight, and TSCC cancelled because they just want to hit a button and see the Nielsen scans. While shows like Survivor go on for season after season. It sucks because we are letting everything be dictated by the few idiots that watch their shows at specific times. We are pandering to those that have no lives. That pisses me off.
It seems that instead of getting better, this stuff is getting worse. The internet is no longer just a tool for geeks and nerds, it is accessible to anyone and everyone. Don't believe me? Just watch a video on YouTube - any video really - and read the comments posted. You'll find that the majority of the people commenting are certainly NOT geeks and nerds. Yes, the internet is still mainly run by the smart people, but with Web 2.0 you'll find more and more that everyone has discovered they can make their voices heard, for good or ill. Yet corporations still think it's a fad. I can't tell you how many times I've gone to a company's website and found that information hasn't been updated in over a year. Why is this? What will it take for society's leaders to wake up and tap into this vast world of cyberspace? For something other than advertising, that is.
I just finished the finale of Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles. I am pretty sure they are not going to renew it for another season. Do you want to know why? Because TV networks are still doing everything by Nielsen ratings. Are you kidding me? Raise your hand if you still watch ALL your shows ONLY when they are aired. Interesting, I don't see any. Um, you in the back, you can put your arm down. Nobody likes you anyway. Instead we watch TV on DVRs, TiVos, Hulu, iTunes, and network websites. We watch shows when WE want to. Our lives are too sporadic to live by a schedule determined by dumbasses in thousand-dollar suits. Yet they still gauge everything they do by those little Nielsen boxes. I'll tell you what, I have seen too many shows go the way of the dodo because of those fucking boxes. When are they going to get a clue? I read once that the reason they don't take all the other sources into account when they tabulate their data is because it's too much information. So we get shows like Firefly, Dresden Files, Moonlight, and TSCC cancelled because they just want to hit a button and see the Nielsen scans. While shows like Survivor go on for season after season. It sucks because we are letting everything be dictated by the few idiots that watch their shows at specific times. We are pandering to those that have no lives. That pisses me off.
It seems that instead of getting better, this stuff is getting worse. The internet is no longer just a tool for geeks and nerds, it is accessible to anyone and everyone. Don't believe me? Just watch a video on YouTube - any video really - and read the comments posted. You'll find that the majority of the people commenting are certainly NOT geeks and nerds. Yes, the internet is still mainly run by the smart people, but with Web 2.0 you'll find more and more that everyone has discovered they can make their voices heard, for good or ill. Yet corporations still think it's a fad. I can't tell you how many times I've gone to a company's website and found that information hasn't been updated in over a year. Why is this? What will it take for society's leaders to wake up and tap into this vast world of cyberspace? For something other than advertising, that is.
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